Open Forum
This is a general space where members can post content that doesn’t directly fall into a community category.
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Ally Tips
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Ally Tips
I subscribe to Karen Catlin’s blog 5 Ally Actions which delivers every Friday morning. The last two editions have highlighted three tips I feel are great to share and think about as many of us hit the halfway point of summer and start diving deeper into planning the return of students to campus:
- Share your pronouns (but don’t call them preferred
Clarifying your pronouns is a simple but powerful act of support. Whether you do this verbally or in an email signature, on a nametag, or as part of your video conference profile, you are helping to normalize sharing pronouns. This practice is helpful to genderfluid, transgender, and other nonbinary folks, who get loads of pushback on the pronoun issue overall.
A few years ago,?Sinclair Sexsmith, a writer and nonbinary person, tweeted on this topic, saying:
“Dear cis people who put your pronouns on your “hello my name is” nametags:
Thank you.
When you do that, I feel more comfortable putting they/them.
And I feel much more comfortable talking to you, bc you already tell me you know a little about the gender binary.
Love,
Me”An important caveat: please don’t say, “My?preferred?pronouns are ?”. After all, pronouns are words that accurately describe someone, not simply preferences. Using them shouldn’t be seen as optional. Instead, just say “My pronouns are ?”.
- Evaluate employee onboarding through the LGBTQ+ lens
Christopher Boccuzzo, an employee onboarding and integration manager at a large law firm, wrote a?LinkedIn post about what LGBTQ+ new hires are looking for?as they join your organization. It includes,
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- Access to gender-neutral bathrooms
- Gender-neutral dress code policy (if your organization has a dress code)
- Active usage and promotion of gender pronouns in digital collaboration tools
- Employee resource group for LGBTQ+ colleagues
- Parental leave and adoption policies that support LGBTQ+ families
- Gender transition and gender-affirming care policies
- A non-discrimination policy with specific language on gender identity and expression
(Boccuzzo acknowledges that while this list is not comprehensive, it’s a good starting point.)
Now it’s your turn. Take a look at your employee onboarding resources through the LGBTQ+ lens. If you don’t have all of the items above, who can you work with to make changes?
As Boccuzzo explains,
“Your competitive wages/benefits and culture may be what gets us in the door, but it’s your commitment to true, unconditional allyship that will make us want to stay and grow with you.”
- Don’t insist on pronoun sharing
After reading?last week’s newsletter, a subscriber asked me to address the importance of inviting people to share pronouns?without?insisting upon it. They’ve seen way too many surveys that require people to share their pronouns and icebreakers where the team lead says, “Now everyone introduce yourself and tell us your pronouns.”
I heartily agree. As Jeannie Gainsburg, author of?The Savvy Ally: A Guide for Becoming a Skilled LGBTQ+ Advocate, explains:
“Asking people directly about their pronouns puts people on the spot, making it very uncomfortable for them if they don’t want to share. It can also offend some people who think that their pronouns should be obvious.”
To honor International Pronouns Day last year, I shared three tips from Gainsburg’s book about gathering pronouns respectfully without insisting anyone share them. Review them under?#5 in the October 14, 2022 newsletter.
If you would like to subscribe to Karen’s newsletter for more Ally Actions, you may do so here.
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Caleb Eubanks (he/him/his)
Union Marketing & Communication Manager
University of Central Missouri
eubanks@ucmo.edu
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